What do you need redone in your world? It may be a job ,a career, a relationship, a business ,a strategic alliance , a design,a marriage-Guess what? You are not alone. Everyone of us need to re- vision something in our lives at some time or the other. You are in good company! Welcome to the club !
Envisioning is nothing to be ashamed of infact it’s really using your power of sight beyond your natural sight. Seeing the upgrade ,or new method, or style ,or shape ,or size or future structure before it is actually built,done or put into reality. Envisioning is the unlimited , future perspective we all should have about our selves or anything we are involved in,whether it be relationships ,family ,business ,or careers.What you possess now does not have to remain as it is, especially if it’s not doing what it was designed to do, or be, or its old ,tired, or just needs refreshing.This unlimited future perspective is the opening up of our imagination to see new and different variations emerging out of what already exist ,before it is actually transformed.The ‘NewThing ‘is only limited to our imagination and the work we are willing to put in.
It’s like putting up a bill-board before the building is done.In order to do this It means that you have to take time for some alone time to think,plan and strategize .It means you have to check cost, personnel,designers ,materials and land space , inclusive of your personal desires ,values and passion. It involves work.Its the opposite of daydreaming. It must however happen at the front end and not at the back end of our desired change.In other words, you will only receive your desired result after you have first seen it in your vision beforehand.If you can’t see it,you can’t receive it. If you can’t see it at the front end you can’t have it at the back end. In fact nothing is produced at the back end ,everything is produced at the front end.If you are afraid or unwilling to put in the alone time, the planning time ,the researching time,the pondering time, then you won’t receive your desired change.
Envisioning is a powerful tool to use in turning anything in our lives around. The power of envisioning enables you you get the vision of what you want on the inside. When this happens you are then qualified to birth that vision. In so doing you have now gained legitimacy to your vision. The seed of the vision first has to be planted in you , inorder for it to come to reality.What a powerful tool ! Envisioning can be a long process or a short process but everyone should engage in it if they are aiming for areal difference. However,even though you can accomplish this on your own ,your best bet is to have an experience coach to help you through this process ,so that you can do it more efficiently.How good are you at envisioning?
We wear crowns of Glory, All of us ! Taking this hair journey has caused me to look at my own perception and biases about hair. So I began to research and boy was I enlightened .Besides great facts and advice on hair care ,I began to formulate conversations in my head , and as a habit I have to get them on paper,less they burn a whole in my brain.Nothing mentioned here is made of stone .If you can add or comment ,I would be most happy. Having decided to formally resort to my natural hair ,after being out of it for at least twenty – years ,the depth of my perspective has morphed and changed.To my mind I want to be comfortable with my hair choices ,no matter what and as we are in pursuit of wholeness I figured ,why not look at this topic of hair .This is the first in a few more topics in this series.The less stress I have whether societal or personal the better.
Hair the great divide?
We wear crowns of glory is a much used popular phrase.Usually when we think of this from a Eurocentric world view ,we conjure up images of long,straight, bleached blonde hair . Maybe not you ,but I did.This phrase which was incorrectly lifted in meaning from the Bible ,pitched long hair as the standard hair of beauty and a ‘crown of glory ,’ the acceptable hair to have. While as I read ,the writer was simply trying to build a case for the accepting of long hair on women as opposed to long hair on men.( which was unacceptable in those days) . In fact long hair for women was not acceptable ,and not even the braiding of hair was accepted.The writer is putting across an argument for long hair on women’s head ,rather than establishing a definition of women’s beauty standard.The writer does not specify caucasian as opposed to Afrocentric or vice versa ,but the societal mind did.Therefore crown of glory came to be associate with long ,Caucasian hair.Blonde and bleaching was added later .
I remember the days when most women of African descent and men wanted long ,bone straight – hair , black or very curly hair like an Indian.After that ,we wanted long,bone – straight blonde hair or very curly blonde or mixed toned hair .The struggle with our hair coupled with the struggle with our skin colour did not help our issues. Our struggle with self acceptance and now hair acceptance became tied to our identity.Our identity based on these two factories impacted our confidence and magnified our struggle at a much deeper level than other women of different races.Other races can not aspire to have our brand of hair,which was uniquely given to us ,even if they tried ,but we could change ours to mimic theirs.This was made possible .
Our own acceptance of our selves ,acceptance from our own race ,acceptance from other races and acceptability of us in the wider society ,in general, became a continued major issue for us.In society our hair is still not seen as ‘good enough.’In some cases its still not ‘ good enough’ for employment ,professionalism,corporate promotions and social climbing .The struggle was and is still real. So , in earlier times of this hair struggle ,we were given a glimpse of how we could get some level of acceptability,in the form of perms ,dyes and straighteners. Heralded by a woman of African descent ,who by the way was a great entrepreneur and saw an economic opportunity ,no fault there ,but was governed by these social norms ,surrounding hair.The mind is such a powerful thing that it seeks ways to get what it wants .Our aspiring acceptability was given wings to fly because we needed to solve this limitation we thought we had .We had the power to bring a solution to it.We thought ,if our skin colour is permanent and not easily changed by our best efforts ,we had to find something which gave us acceptability .Hair according to Eurocentric standards became the catalyst of this charge,becoming an entrenched mode of self and societal acceptance.What we failed to realize is that we were and are more than our hair or our skin colour. What we were given is greater than the outward societal connotations of self worth and acceptance. We have to see this . We have to know so. We have to believe this and walk in a new frame of mind towards ourselves and our own people. The crown of God’s gifts ,presence and acceptance .Being created uniquely in his image ,all of us together ,displaying the ‘ many- sided’ faces of God is something much greater which cannot be bought or swapped or taken away ,and we,in loving the part of God’s- image that we have ,will have a unique experience as no other race can.
We are ‘ crowned with God’s Glory.’Prophetic Poetry.
We are crowned with God’s glory.Crowns of the wealth of the beauty of God. Special gifts ,qualities ,abilities ,which are wealth and riches. We have crowns of righteousness ,peace ,and joy.Crowns of strength ,divine power and resilience.We wear crowns of connectivity,significance,respect ,dignity ,influence and internal capacity to do and to make things happen. Crowns of intellect ,the ability to reason,organize ,orchestrate ,produce ,create ,procreate and innovate.Great crowns which we got ,not from merit ,money or status in life but divinely given ,through love.We wear crowns of divine ability to love God,ourselves and others. God ,himself, has placed these crowns in the universe on our heads . He demonstrated His Love by giving us such unlimited qualities ,gifts and abilities.Thank God that the wheels of change are slowly turning and turning and turning and changing and challenging our standards of Eurocentric beauty.Beauty is progressively and aggressively advancing ,evolving and gaining acceptability ,so that each person ,each race ,can enter into Their God – given right of happiness and wholeness.
Marcia Joseph:Elements-consulting- writer/ Consulting coach ,personal and corporate .
Available for group discussions on : Raising self acceptance makes for a happier workplace and work force .
Helping executives create a more positive work environment through executive coaching. Email- elementsconsulting .email@example.com
I often hear this phrase – why don’t you do one thing ! Why are you doing so many things – Your goal should be one thing. While this is true, to a certain extent , it isn’t.It isn’t in some circumstances . It doesn’t line up with all personality types. When I hear this ,inside of my head screams ,please stop, shut up.Stop thinking that every one is the same.Stop trying to put every one into your tiny , limited, controlled managed left brain self. Stop trying to make everyone fit into your image of yourself. If you are only able to engage in one thing for your entire life then ,that’s your destiny. It’s not everyone else’s.I don’t know if you feel this about this way of thinking but I do! Maybe your screams are not the same as mine but I get uncomfortable around such rhetoric .In addition , my entire bodily system begins to escape this presence ,especially when I see the hustle of their one thing mentality This is my attempt to free those who feel stuck in the judgements of others for obvious reasons.
…..Thinking this over , I have never done only one thing in my life and yet I have stayed with them for years , moving and up grading , or branching out or building on something I did , adding skill .I am not mega rich but I have utilized my gifts and am seeking new ways to capitalize them more.Its impossible for me to focus only on one thing because my entire system is wired differently. I believe it’s almost impossible for anyone to really only do one thing because the human body is not even geared towards such a posture. It’s one body having many parts to do various things.The human body is geared towards an integrated self. We have many parts but one body literally, Some parts are duplicated for more efficient function , while others are multiplied , like our fingers and toes and the many parts of our face for integrative function. I think sometimes it’s just a corporate left -brain thinking device to underutilize or destabilize the bodies’ integrated system ,putting it under undue stress in the quest to zone in on one thing. Its like loosing weight using one method only,the moment life gets busy ,you loose your rhythm or you stick to one thing until you get results but you are daffly bored and unhappy. It really is easier for someone to naturally loose weight once they stay active and make healthy food choices than it is for them to keep going to the gym. Ever so often ,we fall off the rut- routine and have to start all over again.But life -style pressures have forced many of us to join the social quest of looking a predictable way ,so many of us suffer through this daily grind of one way.Losing weight and keeping it off is more a mental value, a mental discipline, a mental continuous choice which we make actionable. The dreaded gyms ,unsuccessful diets, place unnatural stress on the human mind and body for tooted beneficial results. This statement of one thing fits right into this scenario with the quest of every one forging a head to look one way.This of one thing of one thing is stereo type at best and it comes over at times as very sexist, mostly tooted by the masculine gender ,who deem themselves successful ,fit and socially primed in a left brain world.Women with all kinds of bodily issues ,changes , salaries, hormonal shits,pregananies and child rating are forced to live up to this subtle undermining mentality, in a male dominated ,patriarchial world.
In the corporate world and before the real explosion of the computer where jobs were primarily, streamlined, simple , repetitive , controlled tasks , doing one thing was the big IT. Then the right brain explosion caught the world by surprise . The new quest for meaning, purpose and happiness seemingly emerged out of nowhere . It was a Suddenly. Everyone thought we were forever stuck in the linear age. The age of managed systems and organisations which gave predictable outcomes .It seems everyone was waiting to be set free from these controlling managed systems ,even the systems themselves were waiting.Now the tech world has gone crazy and the demand for the aesthetics, the use of the senses , the personal touch, and the unabated social engendering of communication , conversation and connecting has dictated a pandering to the same.This pandering escalated giving the right brain systems , organisations and personalities the release they craved. Yet , there are some voices that keep perpetuating this thought of doing one thing ,I have observed ,especially when it comes to women..
I believe good intentions can still deliver a bad message. I have made this boo boo many times and had to acknowledge that the delivery was not the best. . So trying to define someone or something as successful or productive based on one focus area can become annoying to say the least. Life is made up of integrated movement and processes in various seasons and stages of life. I have seen people plug everything of themselves into one career or relationship or business and then life or natural disasters overturn their efforts and they are at a lost to find themselves. Some become suicidal , depressed or withdraw from life simply because they had invested everything into that one thing to make it successful and it collapsed. Look at the great Steve Jobs who after developing this great company called Apple was fired. I often wonder about him throughout this process, to put it in a nut shell what was going through his mind.I mean really.Then there is Ted Turner , who created CNN and after selling was relieved of his seat on the board. Every time he speaks of it you can hear the pain of his lost, when asked what’s his greatest achievement in life , he sheepishly states, apart from my family ,CNN.He hasn’t moved on or can’t after all these years. Why?He invested everything into one big idea.
Some people inorder to build iconic images of accomplishment go to great lengths to keep at the top of the ladder ,for example , lance Armstrong. When we thought his sport was growing and expanding and getting better it was actually diminishing and dissolving.Inspite of all his efforts ,there was an end to the great empire he built It was such a great empire. He did everything to keep it standing.. It is said that he manufactured various unscrupulous ways to keep this image.Yet in the end this great empire he built came down. Leaving him at his age with the problem of res tabling his fortunes.Countless , other examples can be given , which should cause us to rethink this one Big Thing focus which is still lauded even in the face of obvious set backs.
Opposition to the new world of right brain thinking, behaviour and achievement is what I call it. The left brain world is gone but it’s culture still wants its legacy to linger and to be carried on. In the left world , life was simpler , predictable ,more controlled and managed .Persons who operated out of this sphere of thinking , were fully in their element.Outcomes were more predictable . Then the explosion of the social world occurred and social media exploded . Those who longed for meaning , purpose and happiness felt included and no longer weird. Men could type on computers as opposed to type writers without stigma. Women could now be as admiring of themselves as they want to be- selfies rule . Being the est version of yourself on the internet is not applauded.An explosion of jobs and careers in the aesthetic field became more acceptable and both genders were embraced in their ranks. Men breathed a sigh of relief and women continued to engage and explore their creative sides in new , bold innovative ways..
This explosion loosened the hold of reqularly ; creating a whole new slew of career opportunities with tremendous multitasking elements. Giant careers were being built from the core of paying attention to many unpredictable processes and personal Manangers and CEOs now had to shift heir thinking , production and innovative processes. It was no longer a development of a product or simply a management of people, but a huge feet first dive into the messy world of emotions, influence,Servant leading, leading from the front , understanding the experience economy ,becoming encouragers and personal branding – up because the consumers were now more than ever buying based on emotions or appeal and had to be deliberately targeted in the retail experience.Companies focused on aesthetic solutions for consumers and householders.Products were not just selling because of their function but their appeal. Brand appeal became epic . The sensory experience and design which were not as high on the list of priority as it should have been became the cutting edge for retailers and the feast of consumers.
Thank God those who were practicing the gift and skill of indulging creatively did not succumb to the lure and shaming of doing only one thing right,only and for the rest and best of their lives. Not only were they innovating and building huge empires but many budding creative geniuses were released to their full potential. Richard Brandon a man before his time , pushed Virgin group with his hand in many pies albeit with varying results. Trying, retail stores, music recording and innovative leadership strategies. The CEO of Huffppst, ventured into , creative spas for releasing stress for staff, all while focussing on her main sail . I am sure this took her out of her comfort zone but with pleasing results ,- taking care of staff , body , and mind- through tooting the importance of sleep for efficiency at work.So where is the one big thing ! Estimates will vary if this is truly examined and logical analysis given to the results through lenses which are not skewed. Leaders could no longer sit on their ivory tower giving orders .They had to relearn the people touch.; They were humbled into drumming out the echo of big egos .It was a very tough learning curve.Coaching,personal coaching, personal management, executive coaching emerged , dictating a more friendlier approach in both business and in personal life.
When people say do one thing I believe they have it mixed up with do one thing well or do one thing more or build one thing efficiently or stand out for one thing but never only do one thing .To my mind ,our integrated bodily system will only be put under strain of an unnatural modus operandi. It takes everything in the brain cells to only focus on one thing at a time exclusively.Extroverts , who are charismatic , have the charm of pulling the crowd behind them in one direction , they are the ones more likely in this scenario ,who more than likely will build a One Thing dimension of life .They may not be any more interested in people , but rather more invested in their success. However they are better able to harness the crowd to do or build that One Big Thing. Introverts who are usually more emotionally invested in others at a deeper level, bursting with ideas , innovation , creativity and a higher mode of developing others and systems are quietly taking the time to passionately carve out a formidable niche.They are gems, right brainers,persons who build out deeper.
Doing The thing emphasis undermines a great chunk of the earths population – especially women , who are natural multitaskers. They are placed under duress to become and be something they are not ,adding mental stress where they need be none , only flow. They are placed under the banner of low achiever when seen through these lenses.They are labeled as inefficient , limited , not focused and scattered brain ,no good label is given to them ?Yet, in a home ,in a marriage , in a relationship ,they are expected to do many things.